What You State, You Create

road to truthEverything in life is energy. From the chair I’m sitting on, to the people walking down the street, to the trees blowing in the wind, to the emotions swirling around in your mind. All energy. And if we are able to tune in to that energy around us, it should be safe to say that we have the ability to create whatever it is we choose to in this life. And if all of life is an illusion, then the old adage “self-fulfilling prophecy” speaks volumes to our ability to live a life tailored by our voice and actions.

If you think you will never get that dream job you’ve desired, then it is very likely you won’t, simply because your behavior will pull you in a different direction because your mind tells you you’re not good enough. However, if you act as if you are capable of that dream job, and you move in the energy of your belief, you have every reason to believe your dream will come true. Of course, it’s not like snapping your fingers and it is done, your beliefs are moving in conjunction with your actions. Every thought (energy) you send out into the universe reverberates back to you, responding to your request. You may decide to go back to school to acquire that job, or take on a different job to get more experience, or have patience as you work your way up in your current position. All choices you make as you imagine yourself in that dream job are collaborating to see that dream come to fruition.

Every thought you have, and every statement you make, aligns with the path you will be walking. If you often think about how unfair life is and nothing goes right for you, then your energy will create just that. You will very likely surround yourself with negative people too (misery loves company), adding more negative energy to your surroundings. The energy you put out and the illusions you’re creating are sealing your fate to live in your cycle of darkness.

On the other hand, when you live in the lightness of being, there is always a silver lining, no matter what comes your way. You think positively about even the most difficult experiences and know that you are learning lessons to allow you to grow your soul even more. You state what you desire and believe it will happen because your experience proves it. You have trust and faith in the Divine and know that miracles occur because you’ve witnessed it time and time again in your own life. And why? Because you expect those miracles and you’ve learned to give gratitude for everything in life. Every hardship, every blessing, and all in between. And in the end, it is the Light that you see that creates your surroundings.

Whatever it is you desire in life, state it, and then move confidently in the direction you desire. The Angels are working with you. All you need to do is believe in your desire, believe in the outcome, and most importantly, believe in yourself.

See more about Cynthia at http://www.cynthiabrennen.com.

Click here to purchase Cynthia’s book, ‘Living, Loving & Unlearning: A therapist’s guide to healing and living authentically from the inside out’

 

Be Grateful, Not Guilty

your truth

How many of you feel stuck? I mean stuck in your own guilt, you know, the old patterned thoughts that still play in your head and in your bed when you’re trying to sleep at night. Those thoughts that tell you you’re not good enough, you’re not doing enough, and you’re not living up to the expectations of others. My suggestion to you right now is to stop! Stop in your tracks, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?” Why am I doing this to this beautiful Being of Light? Playing those guilt tapes over and over and over again just to please others. This dis-ease has been cultivated by certain people in your life, but it’s you who has signed up for the deal. When you are ready, I have an escape hatch that is foolproof, but here’s the real deal, you have to practice it on a daily basis. And every time you begin to feel that guilt ghost hanging over your shoulder this beam of light will extinguish the haze that mulls around in your mind. Just like that, poof!

This magical beam of light is something every one of us has the ability to practice, and when you do, you will feel a clear difference in your life. What is this special practice? Gratitude. Yes, feeling grateful instead of guilty will ignite your light shining within rather than douse the flames fostered by manipulation and judgment. When you begin to notice everything in your life you feel grateful for, more abundance will naturally show up. But that’s not why we practice gratitude, we practice gratefulness because it is a reminder to ourselves that who we truly are, and living authentically from our soul space, is perfection. Living in the simplicity of noticing that lady bug in the sand or the praying mantis that showed up on that special day is Spirit speaking to you and whispering that ‘all is well’. It’s knowing that who you are is enough, and not just enough, but you are all-encompassing as we are all connected in this vast universe. It’s letting go of the fearful mind games that play in your head and welcoming the warmth of Source into your heart. For it is this connection to God that not only are all things possible, but they are probable.

So the next time guilt comes knocking at your door, whether it is self-induced or literal, take that deep breath, open your heart to your angels, and sing your song of gratitude. And one last thing, shut the door.

Reeling, Feeling, and Healing

 

Notice the signs...

Notice the signs…

Grieving and loss have been thick in the air lately. At least it has been in my therapy room. The big question clients have been asking me is, “How long do I have to endure this pain?” After sitting in silence and allowing the energy to settle in, I review what I have witnessed in the grieving process.

The first stage is Reeling. After the shock of loss settles in, we begin to stagger and stumble, not quite knowing where to grab on to life. Feeling lost, we reach for stability but nothing feels like it did before. We begin to wonder if we’ll ever feel sane again, happy again, and just plain want to live again. We may even feel guilty for having those thoughts, and yet, the pain overpowers the guilt.  Life as we knew it is gone, with no light in sight.

And then we begin to Feel. Reality of the loss drops in and we realize we’ll never have the old back. As we work through our feelings between the tears, anger, confusion, and bewilderment, a shadow of acceptance begins to crack through the tunnel. We begin to see the light, and then the roller coaster comes winding around again. One minute we feel like life is returning to our normal, and the next minute, the pain hits like a ton of bricks again. It is at this point that I remind my clients that the roller coaster ride is part of the process of grieving. We continue to work through those feelings until the span of peace is longer than the span of unrest. In time, as we work through all emotions the reality of what is now becomes the new normal. This doesn’t mean the loss is forgotten. It simply means the loss is accepted.

Once acceptance has calmed the roller coaster, we move into the healing stage. It is here we begin to have a new relationship with the loss. If it is a loved one who has passed, we may begin to connect with them on a spiritual level. I know when I lost my dad the reeling and feeling stages were excruciating for me. It wasn’t until the healing stage that I began to relate to him through energy, signs, and dimes. Yes, he leaves me dimes. I have a client who knows it’s her mother saying hello every time she sees a cardinal fly by. Another client’s rose-bush blooms in the middle of winter. It was his wife’s favorite part of their garden. A friend of mine sees her father with every butterfly that persistently follows her. Open your heart and notice these signals from your loved ones. They are full of love and light in their world and they want you to feel happiness in yours.

There are many different types of losses that happen in our lives besides losing a loved one who passes through the veil. We experience loss with employment, relationships, money, homes, pets, health, the list goes on. Everyone’s experience and length of time in the stages is different. It took me two years before I came to acceptance of my father’s passing. I was reeling for about six months, just trying to find my footing. And then I was painfully feeling for about a year and a half. It was a day of enlightenment when the light finally broke through the tunnel. I felt joy in the realization I didn’t have to pick up the phone to talk to him anymore, I could talk to him any second, any time of the day. He wasn’t only with me in human form, he was with me and around me always. And we were one. That’s the day my spirit crossed the veil with a new understanding of our spiritual connection. Way beyond this world. Way beyond our intellect. A beautiful dimension extension.

For those of you staggering through this process of grief, doing your best to catch your breath, I ask you to trust not only the grieving process but the spiritual awakening that is inside of all of us. There is so much more to us than these shells we habitate while here on earth. When we stop reeling and move through our feelings, it is our spiritual expansion that delivers the healing. It is then that we realize what we thought was lost never left our side.

Surrounded by Love

Surrounded by Love

 

Full Forgiveness is Felt in the Heart

Recently, I had a client who told me she forgave her mother but she still had some residual feelings that were gnawing at her every time she thought about their relationship. My client asked, “Does that mean I haven’t really forgiven her?” After thinking about the many years I’ve sat in my therapist chair listening to countless stories of pain and enlightenment, as well as my up-close and personal experiences with forgiveness, I’ve come to this conclusion. Forgiveness is a process. It begins in your mind and has a need to settle there for a while in order to give your brain a chance to accept and embrace what is to come. We know that forgiveness is mainly about healing yourself, especially your heart. When we release from another’s hold on us it really is freeing, and extremely empowering. When the mind ultimately believes in the truth of its forgiveness it begins to travel to the heart. I explained to my client that she is preparing to travel further into her forgiveness, but first we must work through some of those residual issues and release. Once released, we then do the inner work to fill those gaps that never got filled in childhood. It is never too late to learn to nurture yourself, but first you must truly let go of the resentments seething inside and realize your healing is solely (and soul-y) up to you now. Whether your parents did the best they could, or they didn’t, it’s time to let that go and give yourself a fresh start.

Once your mind assimilates into forgiveness and journeys to the heart, you will feel a peacefulness you haven’t felt before. Your soul smiles knowing that you have received the message of love that stands before you. All feels right in the world because all resentments have been lifted. You’ve let go and blown the heaviness of your burdens into the universe, reaching the completion of full forgiveness.

So when my client asks me if she hasn’t really forgiven because she still has some residual resentments, I simply look at her and say, “Your mind just hasn’t caught up with your heart yet.” And her soul smiles.

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Your Soul’s Purpose

Open your soul

Find your peaceful place…

 

We all have a divine purpose deep within our souls yearning to be expressed. Some of us ignore it and create distractions to take us off course, some of us deny it, and some of us passionately embrace it, allowing our lives to flourish and flow with what we know to be our truth. We are all born with this innate knowledge of our personal purpose. The challenge is to stay in tune with your soul as the years and life experiences pile on.

It’s not unusual for me to ask a client what their life’s purpose is and they simply answer, “I don’t know”. What I suggest to them is that they do know, they need only sit long enough with themselves to feel what resonates within their life path. It often takes some silent soul-searching, mixed with meditation, before they see the light. And when the light hits, all chapters of that person’s life miraculously fit together like an artful masterpiece.

I’ve always known that my calling is in the field of mental/emotional health, but what I’ve come to realize lately bears a deeper meaning beneath it all. At times in my life when I felt I was taken off course I was actually experiencing the pain I needed to feel in order to help others heal. In hindsight, every painful choice was an act of courage so that I may fulfill my purpose here on earth. I am grateful for every challenging experience in my life for it has brought me full circle to joy, reminding me that I never fell off track, I simply rode among the mountains to become stronger. And in this strength, I continue to fulfill my divine purpose.

In the big picture, we are all here to love and be loved. That is an essential realization as you begin to explore your soul’s purpose. First and foremost, loving who you are, regardless of chirpings from the outside world of naysayers, will illuminate the path to your truth. Once that is clear in your mind and heart, you can then begin to explore your divine purpose. Sit in the quiet, connect to Spirit, and breathe in all that you are and have been. Accept it ALL without judgment and allow your chapters to flow. What is a common denominator for you? How have your experiences brought you to where you are today? What are you grateful for? These are a few questions you can ask yourself as you ponder your purpose. Be mindful of every question, practice patience, and it will come.

You might be wondering, why is there a need to explore any of this at all? All I can tell you is I know when I’m living on purpose, and I know when I’m not. The universe aligns with me and flows smoothly when I’m reaching for my meaning. And when I’m not, the universe lets me know that, too. Deep in your heart and soul you know what is right and true. We all feel happier inside when life flows and our hearts open up to the sky. Even in dark times our spirit sees the light through our difficulties. Our soul knows this truth, and when our minds catch up it is a powerful burst of love energy.

After all, in the big picture, we are all here to love and be loved.

The Miracle of Friendship

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Soul Sisters; Kelley, me, Jenn, Lauren, and Marjie.

 

Some friendships last forever. This has proven to be true with a certain group of women I met on the campus of Ithaca College some 35 years ago now. You know it’s a lasting bond when you don’t see someone for 20 years and you pick up like you just saw them yesterday. The same banter, same jokes, same smiles. The same soul connections. Only now there are miles of experiences to share; happy times, sad times, encased with a plethora of bumps and bursts along the road of life.

It’s this road that brought the five of us back together this past summer. Our Jennifer tragically lost her dear husband, Ron, this past February. One day it held the sweetness of Valentine’s Day and the next day he was gone. I attended the beautiful service for Ron, complete with a room full of love and ending with a heartfelt Henry David Thoreau quote. The same quote that is the main quote in my book. A sweet validation that our souls are always connected in this world and beyond.

After the service, Cindy (another soul sister of mine and friend of Jennifer’s) and I walked to the club reserved for all of us to gather. Interesting how a loss makes you notice beauty in the world more. We were commenting how beautifully the trees were lining the lawns of Buffalo’s most prestigious historical homes. Life becomes a bit surreal when we face losing it. I ran into Jenn in the privacy of the coat room, which was good because after not seeing her for 15 years we needed the comfort of a cocoon. She to melt into me, and me to be strong for her. I held her on my lap for a few minutes while she wept. Feeling our sister friendship that never faded. I still remember so clearly Jenn’s words pressing through her tears as we hugged, “I was hoping you’d come.” It was never a question for me.

Soon after, Lauren contacted me suggesting the five of us gather at either her cottage or mine in support of Jenn. I happily offered my place, and after a few emails with Marjie, Kelley, and Lauren, the summer weekend was arranged. I can’t quite describe the joy I felt upon seeing each Holmes Hall girl arrive but with every welcome hug we grew into what we knew. Loving each other.

A few wineries later, we returned to the cottage for more laughs, delectable delights, and reminiscent chatter.  Intermittently holding the sadness between us to allow Jenn her grieving space. Always holding her in the silence interspersed with tears.  We agreed that this must be an ongoing theme in our lives, to reunite every year or two.

Funny how the most tragic of events can breathe rays of sunshine into life. One thing I know for sure, this girlfriend bond that began back in 1979 will never be broken. The magic of love between our connected souls will forever hold the truth of our inexplicable, extraordinary existence. The miracle of friendship.

Me and Jenn enjoying beach time at her place this past summer.

Me and Jenn enjoying beach time at her place this past summer.

Book Signing at Barnes & Noble with ‘Living, Loving & Unlearning’

Book Signing at Barnes & Noble

A BIG THANK YOU to everyone who came to my book signing this past weekend! It was an amazing day filled with wonderful people. So grateful for Cindy Williams who joined me and brought so much light to the signing, along with the lovely Ally Payne with WINK 106, Bruce Sermonis with Community Broadcasters, and all the staff at Barnes & Noble! Thank you all for your love and support.

The end result of this circle of love? All books were SOLD OUT! Elmira Barnes & Noble will be ordering more and ‘Living, Loving & Unlearning’ can be found in the ‘Self Improvement’ section of the store. Hope to see you at future signings!

~Namaste .♥.