“We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust neither can we find love or joy.” ~ Walter Anderson
To be vulnerable or not to be vulnerable? That is a question I am often asked, and my answer is never black and white. There is a time to be vulnerable and a time to protect your emotions and your spirit. When you are in the company of someone you trust, that is the time to test your inner freedom and put yourself out there. Having these experiences allows us to grow in many ways. The more you test the limits with yourself and step out of your own box, the more you will learn and grow from those experiences. It is always nice to have a trusting friend to confide in, who supports you unconditionally. Remember, however, we are all human and even your very best friend can let you down at times. More than likely, this union bounces back if it has a firm foundation of friendship.
A friend of mine often tells me, “I’m never trusting another guy again, they all hurt you eventually!” There are certain people and experiences that hurt you in some way, but that doesn’t mean you have to give up on trusting again. Be cautious, yes. Live in fear, no. Trust your inner instincts. You know when you meet someone, or develop a relationship with them, if you need to have your guard up. Trust yourself and ALL of the signs that come to you. If you get a funny feeling in your stomach when someone makes you a promise, pay attention. If you pull away when someone puts their arm around you, pay attention. If you look into someone’s eyes and the connection is not there, pay attention. Listen to your own soul, intently.
To be vulnerable or not to be….you be the judge. Listen and pay attention to you. Always remember, however, it is not wasted time or energy if you misjudged. Pick up your pieces and learn from it. You will be much wiser the next time around. Never lose the lesson. Take the learning with you. As my friend Raven reminds me…pay attention to the signs. Always.